"
when I failed out of college a huge weight was lifted from my chest
through degrees of separation I found that degrees were separating us
only serving the cause of labeling us most likely to be happy
society told me how to be
but I find I'm much happier being me
I will never define myself or those around me, by the level of education under their belt
because that's a boring fucking way
to be a
worthless
spacious
machine
and the guilt at first killed me
another fuck-up in the family
but the pressure was too much
—every panic attack every class every stare I wanted to take my father's pistol and say goodbye to my friends wanted to lose my head shaking until cold lost my dignity
with every shake of the hand—
I'm scared of what's ahead
but I'd rather be afraid
than continue to be dead
"
— J.D.
