there was an old women who said her goodbyes
by gathering everyone she knew and telling them her lies
“i wasn’t faithful to my husband, i lied to my friends
but in the end i was thinking about you”
when my mom had my brother she was no older than me
so why’s it so hard to imagine a family
where i’m the one in charge, and not just a kid
and i think of what she did
and then my mind tells me to stop, compare what you do
on top of everything she was just a child, too
she wasn’t giving up, despite the things she said
when she left she was thinking about you
i convince myself everyday i’m not going to disappear
you think i’d be okay with the thought after 20 years
but the ideas keep me up, and even if i could sleep
i wouldn’t want to dream, because i’m thinking about you
and it’s driving me mad
i don’t want to think about what we said
or have to justify why i stay in bed
instead of going out with my friends all the time
is it so hard to believe
that sometimes we
as human beings
get sad.