As the screen lights up the cold dark nights
as messengers begging me not to leave
this world by my own hands
though I never mentioned no such thing to anyone
as I never truly gave it any thought my self
The screen fights the darkness around me and in me
through the night
I'm not alone
It’s not so bad
It just can't be
I’m still alive
But my heart is rushing, I'm struggling, trying
'Cause my mind just told my heart
that I'm dying
Ghost pain running through the spine and my mind
What will it feel like when will it end?
How long till I have to face this again ?
What will it look like when will it end?
How long will it last?
I can’t get up and they don’t get it
I’m so imbalanced they just won’t get it
They just can’t see it
They just can’t feel it
I’m so imbalanced
My own little secret
2X
The bitterness is eating me up inside, when I’m alone, I try believing in my own lies, it never works
I’ll take it out on myself once more
Its self-destructive self-deception
I’m just as broken
as everyone else
when my mind poisons my blood, that's what I tell myself
I’m not okay will there ever be a way
To numb this pain in a peaceful way?
I’m too scared I’m too scared to live
Looking back because the future doesn’t have a place for me
I'm not alone
It’s not so bad
It just can't be
cause I’m still alive
But my heart is rushing, I'm struggling, trying
'Cause my mind just told my heart
that I'm dying
I’m not afraid because the reaper passed me down
along his field of work
When he ever was so young
He never did agree, and only said to me
You’re just not qualified for death.
